from up above the end of the ceiling "judy?"

at what point did he begin calling me that? at what point did i begin to accept it and find it strangely cute?

why would i come up there when there's nothing to say, nothing to touch? i know he'll look at me in that strange way, and ask where did i go? maybe i need time. i got time.

this is slap me in the fuck face apparent.

. how

"things that when you initially meet someone seem really obnoxious and annoying and then, once you're with them become really cute," (he said).

and then i said in my typical cynical sarah way: "you're just not at the point yet when those things, the things you once thought were annoying and then thought were insanely cute, move back into an entirely new realm of annoyance. SO annoying that you'd rather grab a spoon and shove it up your ass than listen to your loved one laugh/grimmace/eat/snort/sneeze in that WAAAAAAY."

he looked at me kinda weird, let out the kinda snort/laugh that i still thought was kiiiinda cute in him and then said in a sad strange kinda quin way:

"you are SO fucked"