i've always been a writer. even when i was young. little diaries with little teeny tiny locks...

sometimes what i write is what i mean, sometimes it's not. when i write, it's how i feel. that's it. i don't know if how i feel is "true" i don't even know if feelings are that righteously possible i just know it is at that moment the best way of vocalizing how i FEEL. now, i'm not aware of having written anything that would cause someone the need to 'clear' ones name. frankly, i don't even know what that means apart from dramatic linguistics.

relationships suck. i hate when they end. it's rare that i hate when one is but this round, i hated what is was, and now that it's ended i don't know if i hate it. i hate being alone. i like my hair. it's purple. i stopped drinking. i like the landscaper, we went fishing and talked and talked and talked. the office brat made me post on CL, so i went out with a film graduate on friday. he was quiet reminded me of fph but shorter. it's rare a guy is too short for ME but he may be. great smile though. tonight...rob. very very funny, should be good. so i'm having fun, and i'm ok and have really accepted that at this point in time he and i are not conducive to each other's lives. i see it now. huge. i should have before but didn't. i'm such a tunnel visioner while "in love."

so i told you that weird ramble, because instead of fighting things....i change my response to them...

writing has always been important to me. this whole blog thing? i like it.

however.

my creative license on here is being both monitored and possibly, inappropriately commented on with equally inappropriate "threats."

that's all i can say.

so i will work a little later in the week to move the entire blog to a new "anonymous" address.

email me here: faintedink@yahoo.ca

and i will tell you the new blog address.

it's hard being irresistable...but all the bullshit afterwards sucks like crazy.

there is so much more i want to write.

but i won't.

i mean i will. just not here.

erg.