the landscaper...

comes over at night in coveralls with beer
and we sit and watch werner herzog movies
until we're both buzzing enough that the movie
is just the background noise to the long
winding conversations
he talks to molly in high pitches
he talks to me in low pitches
almost whispers
there is a gentleness about him
where i know he knows he could hurt
but won't

when i first got molly
he wouldn't touch her
terrified he'd hurt her
maybe that's what it's like with me

in hushed tones
he'll say
he doesn't believe anything i say
when i tell him
how much i need him want him
how weirdly non-bitter and non-cynical he makes me
how well we talk, how well we touch
non-intrusive and real

nothing ever happens

and when all the movies are done
he's changed out of coveralls and into
the only
man clothes i have as pj's
and insists on using my toothbrush
i wake up in the morning
his arms around me
morning kiss
belly rubs
and life
the day
is so very very good.

i think
it takes time to know what love is
i think it takes a lot of time
way more than i ever thought
and i think i'm just now
starting to understand
so much
about love
from a guy who's into
plants

i suppose if he can fix a yard
he might be able
possibly
to fix me
i just need a little watering
some sunlight
get rid of the weeds
and inject me with
fertilizer...
ahahahahahaha...

i couldn't help it...funny.